Years ago, I read the book MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS. Thinking that I would despise the book, I read it as a farce, hoping to hate it enough to write a counter-argument to whatever ludicrous notions the author made. The book changed my life. In the pages of that book, I came to understand women like never before. I know it sounds ridiculous, but it’s true. A single book helped me to understand the female mind, and as a result, my relationships with women have changed for the better.
Since then, I have recommended this book to two of my friends when their relationships were heading south, and both times they came away feeling the same way I do. And in both cases, the relationship survived.
There is a great deal of useful information in the book, but one of the critical components was recently repeated in an article in Live Science entitled 10 Things Every Woman Should Know About the Male Brain.
It’s worth reading.
While many studies suggest that women are more empathetic than men, Dr. Brizendine stresses this is not entirely true. The empathy system of the male brain does respond when someone is stressed or expressing a problem. But the "fix-it" region quickly takes over.
"This hub does a Google search of the entire brain to come up with a solution," said Brizendine. As a result, men tend to be more concerned with fixing a problem than showing solidarity in feeling, she said.
In short, the essential conflict between most men and women can be stated like this:
Woman: I have a problem. I want you to listen to me.
Man: You have a problem? Then we must fix it.
Woman: No, I’m not looking for solutions. I just want you to listen to me.
Man: Why tell me about your problem unless you want me to fix it?