The maypole is kind of stupid. Right?

It’s the kind of thing that parents love because they get to watch their kid run around a pole as they genuflect on tradition and ancestry and Earthy goodness, but in the end, the kid is just hanging onto a ribbon and running around a pole. Of all the ancient traditions to survive into the modern day, why this one?


I mean, if your kid grabbed the clothesline and ran around the pole in the backyard, you’d tell him to knock it off.


Add a few men in skirts and funny hats, a beer garden, and some old timey music and suddenly it’s a thing.

Even if your kid is excited about dancing around a maypole, how long does that last?

Three rotations? Four?

Why couldn't trebuchet firing been the tradition that lived on?