Posts Tagged ‘santa claus’
My daughter was annoyed with Mrs. Claus – and let her have it.
I took my daughter on the Essex Steam Train’s North Pole Express last night. For those of you unfamiliar, The Essex Steam Train is a 100 year-old functioning steam train and museum run out of Essex, Connecticut. During the year, you can take a ride the train, celebrate your birthday or your wedding on the…
Read MoreThe cat peed and pooped and vomited on our Christmas preparations, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
My wife and I left about 80% of our preparations for Christmas until December 24. At the beginning of the day, we had only one gift for each child. We needed more presents and plenty of stocking stuffers. We also had yet to purchase gifts for each other, and nothing was wrapped. We had not…
Read MoreSanta Claus spent the day at an abomination of a grocery store, and he was BRILLIANT.
My wife and kids ran into Santa Claus at Stew Leonard’s last week. Stew Leonard’s, if you’re not familiar, is an abomination of a grocery store built to make the shopping experience as least efficient and least productive as possible. It attempts to capture some of the feel of an open market, filled with small,…
Read MoreThe Moth: No Santa
The following is a story that I told at a Moth StorySLAM at Housing Works in New York City in 2014. The theme of the night was Secrets. I told a story about my discovery that Santa wasn’t real and more. I finished in first place.
Read More7 serious problems with the Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer television special
As well as the Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer television special holds up after 50 years (I still adore it), there are admittedly some serious problems with the special in relation to modern day norms that I noticed while watching the special with my family last night. 1. Yukon Cornelius carries a gun and a…
Read MoreSaying yes to Santa Claus and everything else
I dressed up as Santa Claus yesterday in order to entertain a room full of children at a neighborhood Christmas party. A colleague hosts the party each year, and about two dozen children fill her living room to sing Christmas carols and meet Santa. Her originally-scheduled Santa was unavailable for the morning, so I offered…
Read MoreMegyn Kelly of “the very powerful” Fox News is an expert on Santa Claus according to Megyn Kelly. She’s also despicable, at least based upon her non-apology.
“For all you kids watching at home, Santa just is white.” Wow. Though the Santa Claus who I grew up with was white, I have seen more than enough African-American Santas to know that his race is malleable depending upon culture. Regardless of his country of origin and the race of the first Saint Nicholas, …
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